


I Just Want You For My Own

by dinosaursmate



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Girl Direction, Light Angst, Strangers to Lovers, very light
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-18 06:46:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13094637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinosaursmate/pseuds/dinosaursmate
Summary: All I Want For Christmas Is You was drifting out to the street from somewhere, and as Louis turned her head, she realised the house she had stopped in front of had a window open.It was the second week in December, and Louis was already sick to the back teeth of what she considered as the most overplayed Christmas song ever. She scoffed quietly, shaking her head as she lit her cigarette. She inhaled, looking towards the window again and paused, mid-step.The window looked into a kitchen and inside there was a girl swaying left to right as she stirred something in a pan. She was frowning as she danced, and she started to slow her movements until she stopped, and then she let out an almighty sob.=====Louis looks through a window and sees a girl crying, and she can't help but check on her every time she walks past.





	I Just Want You For My Own

**Author's Note:**

  * For [haloeverlasting](https://archiveofourown.org/users/haloeverlasting/gifts).



> Hi Brit! This is your gift! I hope you like it! I love you!
> 
> Thank you to my betas!

Louis got it. She got the fucking job.

“Well done, babe,” Liam said with a smile. “You’ll be able to buy me a Christmas present after all.”

“All you deserve is coal in your stocking.” Louis grinned at her. “Jokes, jokes. I’ll get you something special. You’ve been a great flatmate.”

“Aww.” Liam beamed. “Love you! Right, I’m going for a run.”

“You went for one this morning.”

“But I didn’t run at all last week when I had that stomach bug. Need to catch up!”

And with that, Liam was off, thick brown ponytail swinging in her wake. Louis rolled her eyes and headed straight for the biscuit cupboard. Some people - Liam as a prime example - were super into fitness and nutrition. People like Louis, well… let’s just say she only ran for the bus in emergency situations. She played a bit of football but running for the sake of running was so dull. Liam was out, come rain or shine, and Louis could never understand it.

Louis promised herself that she would walk to and from her new job, though. She was working in a bakery up near the train station, mostly just making coffee and sandwiches to order, but it was a job.

When she arrived for her first day, she was a little nervous and, much to her frustration, it showed in her work. She spilt the milk and she put too much butter on a sandwich, but her trainer, Niall, was so chill about it that Louis thought it was a trick.

“We’ve all done it,” Niall said cheerfully. “I make mistakes and misjudgments all the time! Just be careful around Winston.”

“Oh?” Louis asked, eyebrow cocked. “Why? He seemed nice enough when he interviewed me.”

“Don’t worry, he’s never here, especially not in the daytime.” Niall waved around a petite hand, red, chipped polish on her bitten nails. “But if he pops in, look happy and busy.”

“Alright.”

Her first week went much the same as her first day, except less milk spillage and more free bread. On her eighth day, she found mustard in her hair. Her hair was short and asymmetrical, shorter at the back and on the left. She was prone to twirling the longest bit on the right around her finger and she guessed that she managed to get mustard in it.

And a tomato seed. And a small rocket leaf.

On her ninth day, she raided Liam’s drunk cigarette stash and as she stopped on her way to work to light a fag, she heard something unusual.

_ All I Want For Christmas Is You  _ was drifting out to the street from somewhere, and as Louis turned her head, she realised the house she had stopped in front of had a window open. 

It was the second week in December, and Louis was already sick to the back teeth of what she considered as the most overplayed Christmas song ever. She scoffed quietly, shaking her head as she lit her cigarette. She inhaled, looking towards the window again and paused, mid-step.

The window looked into a kitchen and inside there was a girl swaying left to right as she stirred something in a pan. She was frowning as she danced, and she started to slow her movements until she stopped, and then she let out an almighty sob.

Louis raised her eyebrows. The girl - tragically beautiful as she cried - hunched over the counter and pressed the back of her wrist to her nose. Her long, tangled curls fell in front of her face, obscuring it, before she quickly switched the hob off and dashed out of the kitchen.

Louis frowned as she took a second drag of her cigarette. She exhaled and continued her journey. She hoped the poor girl would be okay but really, what could Louis do? She couldn’t do anything. She sighed as she turned off of the street and onto the high road. When she walked into work, Niall was bobbing her head along to the radio.

“Hiya chick!” she said brightly. “Ready for your first day on your own?”

“Why do you have to leave me?” Louis whined.

“Some of us have plans!” Niall winked. “Also, they’re not paying me after two, so…”

“Fair.” Louis pulled her coat off and headed into the back to hang it up. She came out, slipped her apron on and tied it. “Alright, off you go. Oh, wait. How many slices of bread do I put in a sandwich again?”

Niall giggled loudly. “Shut up, Lou. Ring me if you need me. Winston’s number is programmed into the phone in the back, but you  _ have _ got mine in your phone, right?”

“Yup.”

Niall said her goodbyes and she was gone. 

-

Louis’ first solo shift went smoothly. Not long after four, it got a little busy with kids coming out of school and buying cakes and biscuits with their dinner money, and the school rush shifted into the 5 o’clock rush when crowds of people got off work and swung by for a coffee or a sandwich to catch up on their missed lunch. Not long after six, it finally calmed down and Louis could take a breather. Just as she stopped for a drink of water, Ben Winston strolled in.

“Hi, Louis. Been quiet?”

Typical. “Actually, I’ve been run off my feet. Is there any more cucumber in the back?”

“Yeah. Wait here one sec.”

Winston disappeared into the back and Louis breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe Niall was overreacting or maybe she had a grudge against Winston. He didn’t seem so bad.

“Cucumber,” Winston announced, brandishing the uncut vegetable. “Sorry you were on your own today. It won’t happen often, I promise.”

“Oh. That’s okay.”

“Head off on a break. Come back in half an hour? Then I’ll head into the back to do some paperwork until close. Feel free to make yourself a sandwich.”

Louis beamed. She had been craving a cheese and tomato sandwich with lashings of mayonnaise all afternoon. She made her sandwich and sat down at a table towards the back. Her phone had several messages that required attention and she replied to Niall, telling her that the shift was going fine, thank you very much. She responded to her mother telling her much the same thing, and she deleted twenty spam emails.

She finally tucked into her sandwich and when she paused to wipe mayonnaise from her chin, she saw a familiar face walking through the door.

It was the crying girl. She seemed happy enough now, teasing her chestnut curls around her finger as she stared at the menu, presumably trying to decide what to order. Louis chewed at her thumbnail. Crying girl was wearing a wrinkled white t-shirt under a lightweight jacket. She must have been cold, seeing as it was due to hit below freezing temperature today. She was wearing black skinny jeans and some cute little golden pointy flat boots. Her toes were turned inwards and Louis thought she was just adorable.

She gave her order to Ben - Louis couldn’t hear what she said, to her disappointment - and sat down at a table near the door to wait.

Louis got the urge to leap to her feet and go over to talk to her, but she thought better of it. She couldn’t exactly tell the girl she had been peering in her window and saw her crying. Crying girl wasn’t busying herself with her phone. She was gazing around the bakery, watching as Ben made her food, and watching people leave and move around. She glanced over at Louis, who quickly looked down at her own food.

“Ham and cheese toastie,” Winston called out.

The girl smiled and, just like that, she grabbed her food and was gone.

-

It was Louis’ day off and she was heading to Tesco to pick up some bits and pieces, and then she planned to have a duvet day in her pyjamas with just Netflix for company. At least until Liam arrived home.

Her journey to Tesco took her back past the house where Crying Girl presumably lived. Louis couldn’t help but look in as she passed. She felt like a creep, but she had to see if she was alright.

Louis half expected Crying Girl not to even be in her kitchen but there she was, sitting at her table with one knee pulled up to her chest. She was clutching a mug between her hands and staring down at a plate of toast. She looked so heartbreakingly sad that Louis almost welled up.

She had to walk away before she did something stupid. That, or get caught. When she walked into Tesco,  _ All I Want For Christmas Is You  _ was playing, and Louis’ mood plummeted.

She dashed home with her shopping as quickly as she could, just about resisting glancing into the girl’s kitchen on her way back.

-

When Louis was on her way to work the next day, Crying Girl’s kitchen was empty, and Niall was her usual bubbly self when Louis arrived at work. Louis couldn’t help but smile.

“Do you ever switch off?” she asked her fondly. “Do you ever get tired?”

“You don’t wanna see me when I’m tired.” Niall tightened her messy ponytail. “But I only need, like, six hours of sleep and I’m set.”

“I need more like nine.” Louis shrugged, grinning.

Niall tilted her head as she grinned back. Louis couldn’t help but smile whenever she was in Niall’s presence. She was cute and vibrant, her blueish eyes always twinkling as she bounced around the bakery. She was very popular with the customers, and she knew how to charm them with her pretty face and winning smile.

She charmed Louis every day, but not in  _ that _ way. Niall wasn’t really Louis’ type. Sure, she was cute and petite, but Louis’ type was more like-

The door opened, and in she walked.

Crying Girl was chewing on her bottom lip, big eyes glancing around the bakery. They fell on Louis, who almost blushed. Almost.

“Hi!” The girl smiled. “Um… are you new?”

“Kind of. I’ve been here, like, a fortnight.”

“Ah.” She nodded with a grin playing on her lips. “Yeah, I drop in, like… once a fortnight.”

“You were in here a couple of days ago.”

_ Shut up, shut up, shut up.  _ Louis tried to keep her face neutral as she mentally kicked herself and tried to keep from screaming. 

The girl shrugged. “I was hungry!”

“Well, what can I get for you today?”

“Just a latte, please.”

Niall took payment as Louis made the coffee. When Louis turned back around, the girl was leaning on the counter with her elbow, hand pushed into her hair and her lips pouting. Louis nearly dropped the coffee. She was gorgeous, and Louis had the urge to put her hands on her.

“Thank you.”

“Um…” Louis quickly grabbed a plate and placed a gingerbread snowman on it. “I’ll throw in a Christmas cookie for you.”

“Oh!” The girl’s face brightened. “Thank you. That’s lovely.”

She flashed one last smile before making her way to a table and sitting down. Niall elbowed Louis sharply in the ribs and she realised she had been staring.

“What was  _ that _ about?” Niall whispered.

“Um- what?”

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Louis composed herself and plastered on a look of fear. “That… that girl is my great, great grandmother. She died in the war!”

Niall snorted so loudly that a man at a nearby table turned to look at her in alarm. 

“Yeah, sure. Whatever! When I see the ghosts of my ancestors, I always give them free snowman cookies. Anyway, that’s Harry. She lives round the corner. Pops in from time to time.”

“Oh. Is she… um…” Louis cleared her throat. “She seems nice.”

“Yeah, seems it. I don’t really know her. Just know she likes a latte and the occasional toastie.”

Louis watched as Harry scoffed her cookie, dropping crumbs down her top and shaking them out onto the floor. She glanced over at Louis and mouthed that she was sorry. Louis just smiled in response. When Harry left, she somehow managed to trip over her own feet on her way out.

“See ya!”

-

The next time Louis saw Harry, her heart nearly broke.

Harry was sitting at her kitchen table with her head in her hands, curls dragged back into a bun. Her shoulders shook, her body shuddering. 

Louis chewed her bottom lip, fighting the urge to hammer down the poor girl’s door. What on earth could be making her so sad? A million thoughts ran through Louis’ head. She dared not ponder any one scenario for long. After all, she knew nothing about Harry. She forced herself on to work where Niall was waiting.

“Have you met Zayn yet? She’s gonna be around tomorrow with you. You’ll be on your own for a couple of hours but it’ll be quiet. She’ll be by after class. Have you met her yet?”

“No.”

“Oh, she’s great. Bit moody sometimes but she is really great. Since you’re here, I’m gonna go on lunch. Is that alright?”

Louis was already exhausted after two minutes with Niall. Still, it was a quiet day in the bakery. Niall made herself a toastie and sat in the corner with her phone and Louis busied herself wiping down the surfaces.

When Harry came in, a shock of anxiety shot through Louis. 

“Hi!” Harry smiled. “A latte, please.”

The only hint to Harry’s earlier mood was a slight puffiness around her eyes but, other than that, she seemed cheerful enough. She drummed ring-clad fingers on the counter as Louis made her drink. Louis searched her brain for something to say other than inane small talk. She came up blank.

“Here you go.” Louis placed the cup in front of Harry who handed her a five pound note. Louis issued her change.

“Wait.” Louis plated a Christmas tree cupcake and placed it next to Harry’s latte. “On me.”

Harry raised her eyebrows, gazing at the cake before beaming up at Louis. “Oh, you don’t have to. Thank you.”

The need to justify herself danced on Louis’ tongue, but she bit it.  _ You deserve it  _ or  _ you need cheering up  _ or  _ you’re really fucking pretty _ just wasn’t something she needed to say.

“Careful,” Niall said in a sing-song voice behind Louis, startling her. “If Winston catches you, you’ll be out on your ear.”

“Oh. Shit.”

“The occasional one’s okay, but just be careful.” Niall glanced over to where Harry had sat with her coffee and cupcake. “There’s other ways to flirt, you know.”

“Shut up,” Louis growled, more vicious than she had intended. She softened it with a fond smile. “I’m not flirting. She just… she seems sad.”

Niall pouted. “You think?”

-

Louis sat on a low wall on the other side of the street as she smoked her cigarette.

Harry’s kitchen was brightly lit but she was nowhere to be seen. Maybe she had taken her crying to a different room. Somewhere Louis couldn’t spy on her. Louis’ creeping fear that Harry had seen her dissipated when Harry walked into the kitchen. 

She seemed kind of alright today. She moved around the kitchen, opening and closing the fridge, pouring herself a glass of water, doing the washing up. Afterwards, she dried her hands on a teatowel as she stood at the window, looking up at the tree just to the side of her house. She suddenly looked directly across the road and straight into Louis’ eyes.

“Shit! Fuck,” Louis cried out, scrambling to her feet and darting down the road and around a corner. She leaned against the wall to catch her breath.

Shit. Harry had seen her. She was going to think Louis was a fucking stalker. But it wasn’t like that. Louis had to walk past to get to work anyway, and she just wanted to check that Harry was okay. That was okay, right? Louis made her way to work, feeling shitty and dreading the shift ahead. What if Harry came in?

She didn’t. She didn’t come in that day or the next day, and Louis was starting to think she had scared Harry away. That wouldn’t be fair, at all. Harry had been a customer here for longer than Louis had worked here. On the third day, Louis had been making grand plans to leave the job, and declare her love and regret in a handwritten letter when Harry walked in.

“Hiya!” she said brightly. “Um… can I have a ham and cheese toastie please?”

“No problem. Eat in? Or take away?”

“Ooh… think I’ll eat in today. A bottle of water, too, please.”

“How are you today?” Louis asked, trying to sound conversational.

“Oh…” Harry expression stayed the same, but the light in her eyes dulled. “Can’t complain.”

Louis smiled politely. “That’ll be £4.20, please.”

Harry handed her a five pound note. “You can keep the change.”

“Oh, thank you. That’s very generous.”

Louis dropped the eighty pence change into the tip box, which Winston made them keep out of plain sight. To Winston’s credit, he did at least share the tips out fairly and didn’t take a cut for himself.

“Take a seat, and I’ll bring it over.”

Harry smiled prettily and headed over to a table against the far wall. Louis forced herself to look away from her, instead focusing closely on the timer. Twenty seconds until the toastie was done. Nineteen. Eighteen.

Louis rolled her eyes at herself and fetched a plate and a napkin. She barely acknowledged the music that played over the speakers anymore, but when a lull in the same old Christmas songs was followed by the opening tune of  _ All I Want For Christmas Is You,  _ she spun around to look at Harry.

Harry reacted a split second after Louis, and Louis looked at her just in time to see her burst into tears. Louis grabbed a few more napkins and, when timer hit zero she plated Harry’s toastie, scribbled something onto the top napkin and headed over to the table.

Harry looked very embarrassed, sobbing quietly to herself as to not catch attention. Louis approached and placed the toastie and napkins down in front of her. As Harry looked up, Louis gave her a quick smile before darting back behind the counter. 

She watched as Harry took deep, shuddering breaths before attempting a nibble at the toastie. She stilled as she went to pick up a napkin, smiling down at the scribbled message. She ate the toastie with more conviction, now, standing up to return the plate to Louis, clean napkin folded carefully underneath.

Louis pulled the napkin from underneath the plate. Harry was back in her seat, one knee up against her chest as she scrolled her phone.

Louis’ own message,  _ Want a shoulder? I finish at 3,  _ messily scrawled in black pen, was followed by four pretty words written in red.

_ That would be wonderful xx _

The kisses were a nice touch that made Louis’ heart go funny. She looked at the clock, and it was twenty-five to three. Zayn should have been here five minutes ago. If she was late again and Louis couldn’t talk to Harry, well. Louis wouldn’t be happy. In fact, she’d-

“Hiya,” Zayn huffed as she banged through the door. “Fuckin’ class overran.”

“Oh, it’s no problem,” Louis replied, waving her hand dismissively. Harry had glanced over to watch their exchange and Louis felt self conscious. “Busy day?”

“Could say that. Let me just get myself ready and you can shoot off. I bet you haven’t had a break.”

“Oh, I… well, no. I ate lunch whilst serving.”

Zayn rolled her eyes and headed into the back. She returned two minutes later, having ridded herself of her coat and bag, and she was drying her hands.

“I can’t wait until I no longer need this job,” Zayn said quietly. “When I leave, I’m giving Winston a piece of my fucking mind.”

“Chill out, love.”

Zayn looked at Louis and smirked fondly. “Go on. Get out of here.”

“What if Winston comes by?”

“He won’t. He’ll be picking his kids up from school about now. If he does… I’ll tell him you’re in the toilet.”

“Oh, I might be around for a bit, gonna have coffee with my, uh... friend.” Louis gestured over in the vague direction of Harry.

“Oh, you know Harry?”

_ “You _ know Harry?” Louis asked in a hushed tone. “How do  _ you _ know her?”

“She used to go to my uni.”

“What do you know about her?”

Zayn laughed and looked at Louis like she was losing it. “Not much, mate. She seemed like fun. Didn’t see her at many parties, or anything, but when I was around her she seemed kind of… goofy?”

Louis considered this as she slipped off her apron, remembering at the last minute that the napkin was tucked into the pocket. She quickly removed it and pushed it into the back pocket of her jeans.

She went in the back to wash her hands, quickly checked her makeup and dabbed on some tinted lip balm before coming back out onto the floor and sitting quietly opposite Harry.

Harry looked up and, God. Louis felt like she couldn’t breathe. Harry’s eyes were red and glistening, big and bright and rimmed with swollen eyelids. She sniffed, looking back down and smiling shyly. She was beautiful. Her two square front teeth dented into her red bottom lip as she took a deep breath.

“I’m Harry.”

Louis giggled softly. “You told me when we first met. I’m Louis.”

“Oh!” Harry looked up and tilted her head. “I love that name.”

Louis nodded in lieu of saying something stupid and pushed the long side of her hair away from her face. This was awkward as hell but in the best way possible.

“Um…” Louis cleared her throat. “So… are you alright?”

Harry took a deep breath again, fumbling with her water bottle. She sniffed, and Louis wasn’t sure but she thought Harry gave a minute shrug.

“Christmas is just a really hard time for me.” Harry sagged as if speaking the nine words zapped all her energy. 

“You can tell me. If you want.” Louis smiled encouragingly even though Harry wasn’t looking at her. “I often think it’s easier to tell all your problems to strangers.”

Harry sighed heavily. “Well, my- my boyfriend left me last Christmas. We’d been together for ages.  _ All I Want For Christmas _ was always our song. It didn’t even end badly, not really. But she-” Harry froze and rolled her eyes closed, dropping her head into her hands.

“Hey.” Louis reached out and squeezed her arm. “It’s okay.”

Harry sighed yet again and dropped her hands to the table. She glanced up at Louis and grinned coyly.

“Okay, so… my  _ girlfriend. _ She left me to go and study in China. Neither of us were really keen on a long-distance relationship, and anyway, she’s not even sure if she’s gonna come back. Not right away, anyway. There wasn’t much else to do, really.”

“Oh, Harry. That’s so rough.”

Harry sniffed. “I know what you’re thinking. And I know I should be over it by now, I just…”

“Hey. No. That’s not what I’m thinking at all.”

Harry chewed on her bottom lip. “Really? What  _ are _ you thinking?”

“Just that you must be hurting a lot.”

“Oh.” Harry managed a small smile before shrugging. “I’ve been fine for months and months but I suppose the season is hitting me hard. I just have too many Christmas memories with her, and don’t even get me started on that fucking Mariah Carey song.”

Louis smiled fondly. “Well. I can’t help heal your heart, but I _ can _ work out how to delete that bloody song from our playlist.”

Harry laughed at that, a bright, beautiful smile on her face that Louis couldn’t help but be pleased at causing. She glanced over to the counter to check if Zayn was watching them, but she was too busy applying lipstick in the reflection of the sandwich press.

“So, you know Zayn?” Louis said, trying her best to avoid an awkward lull in conversation.

“Uh… kind of? Like, I know her, but I don’t  _ know _ her. We’re a bit different, I think.”

Louis looked over at Zayn as she closely inspected her perfect manicure. She had her back to the door, and a nervous looking man awkwardly hovered at the end of the counter, waiting for her to turn around.

“I’ll say.” Louis smirked.

The lull came, but it felt comfortable as Harry drank from her water bottle and Louis watched the world go by outside the window. It felt comfortable, being in the presence of Harry. 

“Um…” Harry cleared her throat, breaking the quiet. “I think I should go home. My phone is about to die and my mum is supposed to call. If I don’t answer, she’ll just worry.”

“Alright.” Louis stood to her feet. “Can I walk you home?”

A small smile broke across Harry’s face. “That would be nice, yeah.”

“Alright. Let me just get my coat.”

Louis fetched her stuff and as they left the bakery, she pushed her hands in her pockets. It was absolutely freezing out. Harry wasn’t wearing many layers, and Louis worried she was cold. Then again, her house wasn’t too far.

Neither of them acknowledged the fact that Louis knew where Harry lived. They turned onto her road, Harry seemingly trying her best to slow her pace to match Louis’. She had longer legs than Louis, but apart from that, Louis might have been walking slower than usual. She just didn’t want their afternoon to end. 

“This is me,” Harry said awkwardly as they arrived at her house. “Thanks for this, Louis. You’re a star.”

“You’re welcome. If you need anything… well, you know where I am.”

“Thank you.” A sly smile crept onto Harry’s face. “I might have to start visiting the bakery more often.”

And with that, she pressed a barely-there kiss to Louis’ cheek, squeezed her arm and bounded inside.

-

Louis had thought about it all evening. And all night. She even dreamed about Harry, but the less said about that, the better.

And now she had been thinking about it all morning. What did she  _ mean? _ Was she flirting? It felt like flirting. Had it been an inappropriate time to flirt? Was it inappropriate of Louis to think she was flirting?

She was overthinking. She knew she was. She had already tripped over Niall’s feet twice since opening and, even though she found it hilarious at first, Niall was starting to get annoyed.

“If you drop hot coffee all over me, I’m not gonna be happy! I’ll fucking kick off at ya!”

“Sorry! Sorry. Things on my mind.”

“Wanna talk about it?” Niall asked hopefully. 

“Um… well, it’s just a-” Louis’ eyes darted up as the door banged open. “I’ll tell you later.”

“Hi!” Harry grinned. “Ooh, nice hair, Niall.”

“Thanks!” Niall beamed, shaking her blonde waves. “Been to the hairdressers.”

“Bet you’ll mess it up at football tomorrow, though.”

“Ah, I have to get dirty to win.”

Louis raised her eyebrows and shook her head. “I didn’t know you played, Niall.”

“Do you play? Ah, God, we have to get a team together. Do you reckon Zayn plays?”

Louis snorted. “No.”

She glanced up at Harry, smirking, and Harry was already watching her. She fought a blush and looked back at Niall.

“Ni, I think we’re nearly out of ham. You wanna go in the back and fetch some?”

Niall huffed and, with a flick of her hair, she disappeared into the back.

Harry laughed. “She’s so cute.”

Louis felt her face fall at Harry’s comment and by the way Harry’s eyes widened ever so slightly, she had noticed.

“Um… have you already had your lunch break?”

“No, I was gonna take it in a bit.”

Harry gazed into her eyes, and Louis willed her face not to turn red. “I was wondering if you wanted to have lunch with me.”

_ Don’t overthink, don’t overthink, do not overthink.  _ “If you mean in here, then definitely. I get free lunch, so…”

Harry nodded, smiling. “Yeah. Sounds good.”

“That fridge is too fuckin’ cold,” Niall complained as she walked back in with the ham. “It’s bloody half frozen.”

“I’m going on my lunch,” Louis told her. “Will you make Harry a ham and cheese toastie while I- is that what you want?”

“Um, yes, please,” Harry replied.

“I’ll be back in a sec.”

Louis hurried into the back, pulling her apron off on the way. She hurried into the small staff toilet and fixed her hair, checked her makeup. She wished, now, that she had made more of an effort, but she hardly fancied applying a full face of makeup when she had to wake up at 6am.

When she came back out the front, Harry had settled at a table in the back of the bakery. Louis headed behind the counter to make her own lunch.

“Made a friend?” Niall murmured.

Louis paused, looking at her. “And?”

“Nothing.” Niall shrugged, an expression of nonchalance on her face.

The sandwich press buzzed and popped open. Niall turned and plated up Harry’s toastie.

“Harry,” Niall called. 

Harry stood up and quickly walked over. Louis stubbornly stared down at the baguette she was stuffing with cheese. 

“Cheers,” Harry said to Niall. “Shit, can I get a bottle of water, too?”

Louis looked up. Harry had taken her coat off and was dressed in a red plaid shirt that was open down to her bellybutton, white tank top underneath. Louis couldn’t help but look when Harry leaned forward to hand Niall the money for the water, her shirt gaping open and, shit. It was blatantly obvious she wasn’t wearing a bra, and Louis’ eyes darted back down to her baguette.

“Thanks, Niall. Louis? I’m just sitting over in the back.”

“Be there in a sec,” Louis replied, cutting her baguette in half and trying not to slice her fingers off in the meantime. 

“Be cool, Lou,” Niall whispered.

“Shut up,” Louis mumbled. “Plate up a Christmas cookie for me, will you?”

Niall snorted in amusement as she popped a Santa shortbread onto a plate and handed it to Louis. 

“Thank you.”

Louis walked over to Harry and placed the biscuit down in front of her. She looked up at Louis, beaming.

“Aw, another Christmas treat?”

“Just trying to win your affections.”

Harry smiled softly. “Well, you already have those. Thank you again for yesterday. It really helped me, you know.”

“You deserve to be happy. Especially at Christmas.”

Harry sniffed and sighed, before taking a bite of her toastie. Louis tucked into her own lunch, and they ate in silence for a while. Louis tried to ignore the constant gaze of Niall.

“You know, I  _ did _ see you outside my house the other day.”

Louis’ heart plummeted into her stomach and she dropped her face into her hands. Harry laughed, reaching over and pulling Louis’ hands away.

“Don’t be embarrassed,” Harry said with a kind yet mocking tone.

“It’s not as weird as it seems,” Louis said, almost pleading. “I saw you crying one day on my way to work, and I just kind of started to look in when I walked past, just to check you were okay.”

Harry’s smile faded and she looked down at the half of her toastie she was yet to eat. 

“And I wasn’t.”

“You should’ve seen yourself. It was heartbreaking.”

Harry looked up at Louis, unshed tears shimmering as she rolled her eyes. “Yeah, well. It hurts to live it, too.”

Louis sighed. “Sorry.”

“No, I…” Harry frowned. “To be honest, I’m really angry at myself that I’m still upset about it.”

“But you have to grieve for the relationship.”

“It’s been a year! A whole year.” Harry shook her head. “I should have got past it by now.”

“Stop beating yourself up.” Louis took a chance and reached out to take Harry’s hand in her own. “Stop fighting against it and just let yourself hurt so you can heal.”

Harry squeezed her hand. “As I said, I’ve been fine until all this bloody Christmas stuff.”

Louis frowned and gestured to the Santa shortbread with a sigh. “God, I bet my little gifts didn’t help.”

Harry cackled loudly, startling Louis and a few people surrounding them.

“No, no. They made me smile. You provided me with, um... a positive association.”

“Oh. Good.” Louis smiled. “What else can I give you a positive association with, then?”

Harry’s face brightened. “Will you come round and help me decorate my tree tomorrow?”

-

Louis sat on her bed in her underwear, legs crossed and trying to decide what to wear. There was a knock at her bedroom door and it jerked her out of a daze.

“I’m not dressed,” Louis called out to Liam.

Liam came in anyway, raising an eyebrow at Louis. “What are you doing?”

“Just getting ready to go out!” Louis replied, a little too defensively. “I’m just trying to decide what to wear.”

“Hm. Out? Out out? Or, like….  _ Out?” _

“Not really  _ out. _ But… not just out. Oh, I don’t fucking know.”

Liam nodded seriously. “You’ve got to wear a dress.”

“No,” Louis replied decisively. “I need to be myself. Dresses aren’t really me, are they? Dresses are something that society expects me to wear because I am female.”

“God, chill out, Lou. So, don’t wear a dress. If you  _ really  _ wanna be yourself, it’s gonna have to be sweats.”

“Sweats aren’t sexy.”

Liam folded her arms and chewed the inside of his cheek. “Exactly.”

Louis stood up and placed her hands on her hips, fingertips digging into the soft flesh. “What? Are you saying that I’m not sexy?”

“Objectively, Louis, you’re attractive. Am I personally attracted to you? I mean, yeah, you look great standing in front of me in your underwear, but when I come home and you’re asleep on the sofa in a onesie with Wotsits stuck to your face…”

“Fuck off.”

“Having not showered in three days…”

“Thanks for the confidence boost. I’m so lucky to have you as my best friend.”

“You asked.” Liam shrugged. “Look, don’t wear baggy, bulky grey joggers. Wear those nice, black Adidas ones. They’re snug around your bum, but they’re still comfy.”

“That’s a great idea,” Louis replied, surprised. 

“You could wear any white t-shirt, preferably a thin one. Draw attention to your boobs.”

Louis scoffed softly. “Liam.”

“You can scoff all you like, but I know you’re gonna do it.”

Louis rolled her eyes and walked over to her chest of drawers to locate the joggers. She quickly pulled them on and turned to look at Liam.

“Alright. How about…” She pulled open her t-shirt drawer and took out a white top, pulling it on and turning to look at Liam. “This?”

Liam considered the worn, dulled-white V-neck top. Louis looked down and could see a modest amount of cleavage.

“Yeah, that’s good. Boobs look great.”

“Is the black bra trashy? I should change into white.”

“I mean… you probably should, but she’s gonna see it through that threadbare top either way.”

“Li!” Louis whined. “Now I wanna change my top.”

“You don’t want her to see your boobs?”

“No, I just… I dunno. I don’t want her to think I want her to see my boobs.”

Liam leaned against the door frame and laughed. “Just put on a bloody white bra, go out and seduce her.”

“Ugh, I  _ hate _ the word seduce.” Louis looked at her reflection in her full-length mirror. “Alright, get out so I can change my bra.”

“You could always go braless.”

“Get out!”

-

Louis knocked on Harry’s door and she was riddled with anxiety. Why did she spend so long getting ready? Harry just needed a friend and Louis was just thinking about herself. Fuck.

“Hey!” Harry beamed as she opened the door.

She looked… Louis nearly uttered  _ wow _ out loud just looking at her. She was wearing a cute little casual dress, dark blue with a little flower pattern, stopping halfway down her thigh and she wore a thick jumper on top of it. Her curly hair was in two plaits and she looked perfect.

“Come in,” Harry said, standing aside and gesturing Louis in. “It’s freezing out.”

It was so lovely and warm inside. Louis pulled off her thick winter coat and hung it on a hook in the hallway, next to Harry’s denim jacket and a thick cardigan. Being in Harry’s home felt strange, even a little intimate. 

“Cup of tea?”

“Thanks.”

“Um…” Harry led Louis into the living room. “Make yourself comfortable. Do you take sugar?”

“None for me, thanks.” 

“Alright.” Harry smiled. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

Louis toed off her trainers and sat on the plush, grey sofa. She looked around the living room. There were framed photos everywhere. Mostly of what seemed like Harry with her family, but there were some of her with friends, too. Louis couldn’t help but wonder if any of the girls in the photos were Harry’s ex.

“Tea,” Harry announced as she walked back in the room, two cups of tea precariously clutched in one hand with a plate of biscuits in the other. 

Louis leapt up to help. She took the biscuits from Harry, placed them down on the table and took a cup from her.

“This one mine?”

“Yeah.”

A small grin danced on Louis’ face. “Are they different? Don’t tell me you take sugar.”

“Just one.”

“Ooh! That’s not real tea now, is it?” 

“Shut up!” Harry replied, stupid grin on her face as she sat down at the other end of the sofa. “I’ve got a sweet tooth.”

“Mm,” Louis said, nodding down at the plate of biscuits, chocolate chip shortbread in the shape of Christmas trees. “Very sweet, and very festive.”

“Well, I like to bake.”

Louis raised her eyebrows and picked up a biscuit. “You made these yourself?”

“Yep.”

“Well, I am impressed.”

“Yeah?” Harry said quietly, smiling shyly. Louis felt like her heart skipped a beat. “You’ve not even tried one yet. They might be horrible.”

“I doubt that.” Louis took a bite and contorted her face in disgust. “Urgh!”

“Louis!”

“I’m joking.” Louis smiled as sweetly as she could manage. “They’re amazing, love. Well done.”

“Baking’s kind of my thing. I used to bake with my mum all the time as a kid.”

“Maybe you should be the one working in the bakery.”

“What, and burst into tears once an hour when that bloody song comes on?” Harry laughed. “Nah, I love to bake as a hobby. I couldn’t bear being around baked goods every day.”

“And yet… recently, you’ve been coming in every day.”

Harry quickly hung her head and her cheeks flushed prettily. “Yeah. Well.”

Louis’ fingers twitched and she almost reached out to touch Harry. She stopped herself at the last second, instead watching as Harry pulled her jumper off and laid it on the arm of the sofa. 

“Um…” Harry stood to her feet and pulled her dress into place. “Let’s get going on this tree, then.”

Louis took a sip of her tea and stood up. Harry picked up an old cardboard box and placed it on a little table by the window next to the tree. It wasn’t a huge tree. It stood a couple of inches taller than Harry, who was carefully pulling a garland of green tinsel from the box and trying to unflatten it.

“I’m not anal about the tree, or anything. It doesn’t have to be neat. I like my Christmas trees to have character.”

Louis smirked. “That sounds like a challenge.”

“Oh, what? You’re gonna make my tree look as shit as possible?”

“Ah, then you’ll think of me every time you look at it.”

Harry tilted her head and smiled. “Yeah. That’s kind of the point of the whole you being here to help me thing.”

Dressing the tree finally got Louis into the Christmas spirit. Harry had a real tree and the smell of pine reminded Louis of being a little girl, when her mum always used to get a real tree before switching to synthetic when they got a dog. 

Once the tree was decorated - full of old, mismatched baubles and worn-looking tinsel - Harry plucked an angel from the box and held it out to Louis.

“Would you like to do the honours?”

Louis took the angel from Harry. It looked homemade, a simple white cone with a paper face, pipe cleaner for a halo and a folded paper doily for wings.

“Who made this?”

“I made it when I was six. Give me a break.”

“Don’t be so defensive. I love it.” Louis smiled and handed it back to Harry. “But I think you should do it.”

“Oh, alright.”

Harry stood on her tiptoes, stretching up to place the angel on the top of the tree. Her dress rode up as she stretched and Louis groaned quietly, forcing herself to look away.

Harry turned around and cocked an eyebrow. “Um, did you say something?”

“No. No, I was just admiring the tree.” Louis smiled innocently as Harry fixed her dress and picked up a red garland of tinsel.

“Come here,” Harry said, closing the space between her and Louis. She draped the tinsel around Louis’ neck. “There. Brings out your eyes. Gorgeous.”

Louis swallowed and took a breath. “Oh?  _ Red _ brings out my eyes?”

“You know what I mean.” Harry lifted the end of the tinsel to Louis’ face and tickled her cheek with it. “If you don’t mind me saying, you look very pretty today.”

Louis parted her lips to respond but Harry moved forwards and pressed her lips to Louis’, startling her and by the time Louis came to her senses to respond, Harry had taken a step back. She looked a bit surprised at herself and she was touching her lips.

“What was that for?” Louis asked softly, her heart thumping in her chest. 

“Sorry! I’m sorry.” Harry sighed, rubbing her forehead and smiling shyly. “It was for… making this a bearable Christmas? Giving me good memories. For helping me cope.”

Louis took a step forward. Her mind was going at a mile a minute, but she tried to focus on the moment. “Well, I’m glad. No one deserves to be sad at Christmas. Least of all you.”

Harry glanced down at Louis’ mouth and sighed. “Thank you. I’m sorry if I overstepped the mark. I’m stupid.”

“You didn’t,” Louis said quickly. “And you’re not stupid. Far from it. In fact, if you wanted to do it again… I’d probably be alright with it.”

Harry chuckled softly, clutching at the tinsel and daring to look hopeful. “Yeah? Well, maybe I don’t want to.”

“Don’t lie!” Louis grinned. “Should I get off home, then, if you don’t want to?”

Louis made no move to pull away but Harry tightened her grip on the tinsel anyway. “I said maybe!”

Louis narrowed her eyes. “Don’t play games, you. Just bloody kiss me.”

Harry’s mouth twitched, moving forward ever so slightly and so Louis closed the gap between them, pressing her lips firmly against Harry’s and exhaling heavily through her nose. Harry pushed her hand into Louis’ hair, fingering and teasing at the strands. Louis couldn’t think about anything except moving her mouth against Harry’s, and she tried not to feel disappointed when Harry pulled her lips away and dropped her forehead to Louis’ shoulder.

“Lou,” she whispered.

“You okay?”

Harry moved her head to kiss Louis’ neck. Louis rolled her eyes closed and tilted her neck, exposing it to Harry. Harry’s breath was hot against Louis’ skin, her lips gentle as they pressed down and Louis wrapped her arms around Harry’s waist as a way of grounding herself before she floated away into space. She already felt as if she were in heaven.

“Your skin is so soft,” Harry murmured. She ran her hand down Louis’ back and stopped just above the waistband of her joggers. She slipped her fingertips under the hem of Louis’ top and dug her nails into the small of her back. 

“Harry?” Louis said quietly. “Are you sure you’re ready? To-”

“I told you,” Harry said in a quiet, light warning tone. “It’s just Christmas that makes me sad. I’m ready to move on.”

“You sure about that?”

“I haven’t been twiddling my thumbs for the last year, you know.”

Louis raised her eyebrows as Harry lifted her head to look at her. “You’ve seen other people?”

“Why?” A smirk twisted onto Harry’s red, plush lips. “Jealous?”

Louis slid her hands onto Harry’s hips and squeezed, material of her dress bunching in Louis’ fists. 

“Yes,” she whispered in reply.

Harry hummed in amusement and nipped at Louis’ bottom lip. “I don’t think  _ you _ need to be jealous of anyone.”

They kissed once again and Harry slid her hand up Louis’ back under her top and ran her fingertips over the clasp of her bra. Louis groaned slightly - mostly in anticipation - and pressed into Harry, their breasts bumping.

“Um…” Harry murmured against Louis’ mouth. “Will you stay for dinner?”

-

Louis woke up the next morning, face cold but everything else was deliciously warm. She was pressed against Harry, who had her back to Louis and was snoring softly, curls seemingly everywhere and tickling Louis on the nose. 

Louis rolled away from her, gently unclasping their hands, and Harry groaned softly in complaint.

“Sorry, baby,” Louis whispered against the shell of her ear. “I have to go to work.”

Harry rolled over, pouting before she had even opened her eyes. When she did, she grinned up at Louis, who was climbing to her feet. 

“Your eyes are so blue.”

Louis paused, smiled, and gathered up her clothes.

“Can I have a shower here?” she asked. “Then I need to pop home before work.”

“Move in with me? You’ll be nearer to work!”

Louis giggled stupidly. “By, like, five minutes.”

“That’s five more minutes you could stay in bed with me.”

“We should probably go on a date before you start trying to move me in.”

Harry pouted again before ripping the covers off and exposing her naked body. She bent her knee and stroked over her thigh.

“Come back to bed, Lou.”

“Now, that’s not fair,” Louis replied firmly. “Stop it. I  _ have _ to go to work.”

Louis ran out of the room and to the bathroom before Harry could protest any further. When she came out fifteen minutes later, she found Harry in the kitchen making tea, dressed in a pink tank top and pyjama shorts.

“Breakfast?” Harry asked as Louis walked in the room.

“Go on, I’ll stop for a cup of tea.” Louis approached her and poked her where her waist dipped. “But then I absolutely need to go.”

“Okay.” Harry brought two cups of tea over to the table and sat down. Louis sat down opposite her. “We- we  _ are _ gonna go out. Right?”

Louis chuckled quietly. “Yeah. As long as that’s what you want. It’s definitely what I want.”

“Of course it is.”

“Well, you can pick me up after work, if you’d like. As long as you don’t mind me smelling of coffee and bread.”

-

“So she’s meeting you here, so you can rub your love in my face?”

“Believe it or not, Niall, not everything revolves around you.” Louis smiled at her placatingly. “Anyway, that reminds me. How was your shift with Zayn yesterday?”

Niall stared at Louis before sighing. “She’s  _ clueless.  _ Honestly. And anyway, I think she’s seeing some guy.”

“Well, she’s a free spirit.” Louis ruffled Niall’s hair. “Keep going, love. And there’s always our staff Christmas dinner. We’re definitely getting pissed after that.”

“The three of us and Winston. Yay.”

“Yes, and me and Ben will make ourselves scarce. I do think she’s interested, Ni. I just think she’s easily distracted.”

Niall seemed unconvinced. The rest of the shift dragged like hell for Louis, the minutes feeling like hours and she was constantly clock watching. To her delight, Harry turned up early to get a coffee and hang around.

“Here, love,” Louis said, smiling stupidly as she placed Harry’s latte on the counter. “It’s on me. And of course: here’s a Christmas cupcake.”

She placed a cupcake decorated as a reindeer face next to Harry’s coffee and Harry smiled fondly.

“Thank you, Lou. I  _ was _ trying to save myself for dinner.”

“Dinner, eh?” Louis grinned. “Well, a cupcake won’t hurt.”

“Go and sit down, Harry,” Niall said impatiently.

Harry cocked her eyebrow but did as she was told. With a quick mischievous grin at Louis, she grabbed her coffee and cupcake and sat at a table by the wall. Louis watched her walk away, her long, lean legs concealed by stupidly tight blue denim and Louis sighed to herself.

“Oi.”

Louis turned to look at Niall. “What? You were rude, by the way.”

“Look, if you go in the back and get some more carrier bags and napkins, you can go early and the two of you can get outta my face.”

“Really? But we don’t close for half an hour.”

“I hardly think we’re gonna have a last minute rush.”

“Well,” Louis said with a sigh, trying not to giggle with joy. “If you insist.”

Ten minutes later, Harry held her hand out and Louis slipped hers into it.

“So, I was thinking dinner and a film. You know, stuff our faces and then go to the cinema and see a crap film? Snog in the back row and make memories?”

Louis snorted. “Yeah, sounds good.”

“Have you told Liam that you’re moving out yet?”

“Shut up!” Louis giggled. “Do you always say such awkward things?”

“Yeah! At least I’m not talking about marriage yet.” Harry smirked. “Oops!”

Louis rolled her eyes happily. As they headed off down the street, hand in hand, Louis felt a bit like they were walking off into the sunset. Harry seemed happy. She looked content and cheery for the first time since Louis had met her, and Louis couldn’t help but feel responsible. She had a spark in her eyes that Louis hoped would never die. 

“Ooh,” Harry said. “I think I fancy lasagne! How’s Italian?”

Louis nodded with a huge smile on her face. As cheesy as it was, she didn’t care what they ate, as long as they were together.

“Fine,” she said, stifling a grin. “As long as I get to pick the film.”

“Deal.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this, it would mean the world to me if you take a second to hit kudos, and if you want to please [reblog the Tumblr post!](https://catfishau.tumblr.com/post/171861905281/dinosaursmate-i-just-want-you-for-my-own-by) <3


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